People are their stories

I heard someone say, "People are their stories. They’re not data with faces."

This made me think about how behind every name on an orchestra roster or a cast list are stories. They're not just people who are hired to do a task, perform a part or role. 

It's easy to treat people that way - as commodities, as musicians who offer a service. And as such, we are replaceable by substitutes who can offer that same service at a similar level of competency. 

This focus on competency and task anonymizes and dehumanizes musicians. We are stripped of our identity to the bare-bones of "section violin" or "second clarinet" or "chorus member."

It's helpful to remember that musicians are humans. The orchestra musicians are humans. The conductors are humans. The executive directors are humans. We are all the same in this fundamental way. And what makes us unique as humans are our stories. 

In his book How to Know a Person, David Brooks shares 4 simple questions to ask to bring out the human stories in us:

  1. How did you…?

  2. What's it like…?

  3. In what ways…?

  4. Can you tell me about…?

They help elicit a narrative about circumstances and experiences that tell you much more about a person than our usual conversation topics like "what instrument do you play?", "where did you study?", or "where are you from?"  

We can practice using these in conversations to get better at engaging with our people:

"What instrument do you play?" can become "How did you come to play your instrument?"

"Where did you study?" can become "Tell me about your training."

"Where are you from?" can become "In what ways does this city feel like home?"

Brooks adds that these questions allow us to surrender our power to evaluate and judge. They allow breadth in the responses that help us know a person better. The responder is in charge of their own narrative. By asking questions this way, we give them permission to share it.  

Seeing people as their stories builds a people-first culture that reminds us of our humanity. How can you apply this to your next interaction with your people?


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